No one has the right to be abusive in any relationship. If you are concerned about whether you are in an abusive relationship, ask yourself these questions which are considered to be warning signs of a problem.
* Was there violence in his family of origin?

* Does he have mood swings, where one moment he is feel loving and affectionate, and the next moment angry and threatening?

* Has he humiliated you in front of others?

* Does he anger easily when drinking/drunk or on drugs?

* During conflict does he often threaten or ignore you, destroy personal property or sentimental items, slam doors, or leave?
* Has he threaten to hurt you or the children?

* Has he ever used physical violence (scream at, slap, punch, hit, kick, grab, shove, shake, choke, bite or otherwise abuse) you, the children or any past partners?

* Has he used or threaten to use a weapon against you?

* Is he a very jealous person?
* Does he regularly accuse you of being unfaithful?

* Does he "track" all of your time?

* Does he try to control how you think, dress, who you see, how you spend your time, how you spend your money?

* Does he try to discourage you from seeing your family or friends?

* Does he get angry or resentful when you are successful in a job or hobby?

* Does he prevent you from working or attending school/college?

* Does his conversation ever escalate into threats of separation or divorce?

* Does he ever threaten to hurt you, herself, or others, if you talk about leaving her?

* Does he criticize you for little things?

* Does he do or say things that are designed to make you feel "incompetent", "crazy" or "stupid"?

* Does he blame alcohol, drugs, stress, the children, others, especially you, or other life events for her behavior?

* Does he feel guilty after aggressive behavior and strive for your forgiveness?

* Does he think that she could never live without you, yet other times wants you out?

* Does he force you to have sex against your will?

* Does he use sex or other favors as a way to "make up" after conflict?

* Does he control all finances and force you to account in detail for what you spend?

* Are you sometimes afraid of him?

If you answer yes to any of these questions, you are in a potentially abusive relationship and should talk with police, social services (especially if children are getting abused), a therapist, minister or friend.

DO NOT DELAY...ACT NOW!